That spring the National Guard mowed down four students at Kent State. We celebrated Josh's second birthday in May and my parents flew down from Oregon for a visit when a few months later I arrived at age 31 with hope that things were going to improve. It was exciting and scary to live alone with my kids again. I waded through grieving both their fathers that summer. To this day, something in me has never recovered from not being able to keep either one of them. It was a shining yellow summer mixed with a lot of crying and a little bit of shouting. There were men who came and went quickly in my life, like comets. Out in the world the war killed more Americans and conscientious objector status was legally created. The Equal Rights Amendment passed the Senate and House of Representatives (but in all these years has never had the ratification necessary to become a formal amendment to the Constitution). Women were gathering strength side by side with civil rights and the anti-war movement - and on Hill 805 in the mountains west of Hue, 11 young members of Delta Company died forever.

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